Mantra

Breathe innnnnnnnnnnnn. Breatheeee out.. Repeat.

Smoke-Free- Meh I lost count, I don't smoke anymore...

So I was reading this magazine, I believe it was Whole Living, but for the life of me I am completely spacing it. It was an article on mantras and how they can be beneficial to people. In current culture, mantra is seen as a "mission statement". However in yogic tradition, the origination of the word or verse when repeated is suppose to create sonic vibrations that encourage spiritual awakening. Whole Living-Mantra.

While reading this article, I found myself wondering if I had such a mantra like this... and I thought of it. Last Monday I got all this blood work done to determine if I have a rare blood disorder. One of the tests, they purposefully cut your arm, and watch it bleed to see how long it takes to bleed. Which FYI sounds about as awful as it is. I turned my head away from the lady, and in m y head I kept saying "Happy Place. Happy Place. Happy Place" and slowly felt as the pain went away, and I somehow became lost inside of my head. I than realized this is my mantra. My Happy Place. The place that i go when I awaiting a doctor or an IV to be inserted into my arm or while I am having incredible pain. I find my Happy Place and it manifests my body into a world where pain is relative, and I am no longer in pain but in my Happy Place. With deep breaths in and out while I repeat in my head, I think of my Happy Place. Hmmmmm funny how in touch I am with my body and spiritual living and I don't even know it.... all though I am started to realize it slowly.

Odd world it would be if I come back positive for a blood disorder. See here is why. My horse when I was 12 years old, got scared and went to jump over a fence. However he jumped over the portion where the post was at, and hence while he jumped he stabbed himself int he lung with the fence post. Now I was 12 years old, my parents where on a hike with my sister, it was a holiday and cell phones back than came with a giant case and could only work in a rare blue Moon. So I sat on the ground next to my horse, literally dying in my arms. The vet took hours since it was a Holiday,. my parents came home to crying little girl with a horse that was dying slowly inside. Permanently scared me on horse blood in case you are wondering... If I see horse blood, triggers that painful day. ANYWAYS, so here the odd thing. Turns out my horses injuries alone should not of been life threatening, however after speaking with the vet and doing some research, turns out the vet thought he had a blood clotting disorder....to which I researched like crazy all through out my teens... Way of healing I suppose. How odd of a twist in life would it be for myself to be diagnosed with the very same condition?!?!?!? Results come back next Monday. Till than, no sense in stressing myself out. Doctors tell me I am under to much stress anyways. LOL