Looking back...

Oh my how far I have come. Here we are in the middle of my busy season (I am taking a break as I have been at work since 6am without any really sort of breaks besides facebook checking and some emails..) and so far so good. I like to positive and optimistic and say that I cannot wait to write a letter to my Eye Doc Stevens (shout out!) and say how much you changed my life and made me the person I am today. I think back to the way I was just one year ago. I was in so much pain and so confused on life. i was working 11+ hours, and in so much pain. I couldn't take any painkillers or anything at work, because my job requires that I be 100% all the time, and no spaciness allowed! I think back how I was going to the doctor 4 times a week at least and instead of weekly lunch appointments, I had weekly doctors appointments. i was in a scared, dark and eery place. I was busting my ass at work, and living in fear of every day that came. Every day I awake and I don't feel like dieing, is a good day in my book. Suddenly things in your life just seemed to get put on mute. All that matters is yourself and how much agony and pain you are in. It's worse to when it's internal pain. When someone sees a cast or a broken arm, they understand you must be in pain. But if your bladder is so fucking inflamed if feels like you are going to pee your pants & your ass burns like you just ate a jalapeno burger, people cant see this pain. They have nothing to relate to. Amazing how life changes when you take control over it.. and with the right meds & doctors who never stop finding the answer.

So here is to the doctors in the world who changed their patients lifes for the better and NEVER stopped believing that someday, they would find an answer!!