AHHHHHH stress

See here is the pisser about auto-immune issues, they are triggered by STRESS! Which helps nothing when financially you are trying to decide if you want to keep your house, working on being a partner in a firm, working with money problems from health issues and oh yea, trying to figure out if you marriage can survive all this shit, or if the pain is just to much. Sacrificing is a bitch, you have to decide if it is worth it. I made myself sick studying for and obtaining my education and license. But I MADE the choice to deal with it. The nature of my marriage was sacrificed, but I did it because I made the choice. When you are dealing with stress triggered diseases and well life right now is stressful it's super hard. You have to make this conscientious decision to try and put those things behind you, and live you life. Because IF YOU DON'T you literally will make yourself fucking sick. Balling your head off for hours over a relationship, only triggers my issues. See it isnt just the fucking normal marriage problems, I get to deal with bury vision, stabbing pain in my eyes for hours & a massive headache because MY EYES aren't suppose to tear. My body gets mad and it fucking blows. I can give myself one day to try and feel things, and that's all I can give... literally or my body will fucvking trigger itself, and attack me. Thanks dude. Like it isn't hard enough trying to figure out if your husband even loves you anymore, losing your house and trying to make those decisions, but I have to try and make my body believe that everything will be okay.... Bugger of a bitch. So now, so we fought at lunch and I more or less told him I think we are over, but now I get to deal with the stabbing eye pain & headache for the rest of the day, while I am constantly reminded that emotionally I am a fucking wreck. *sigh* Awesome, my bladder & girlie part is inflammed, and I am bleeding feeling like I have the worst bladder infection ever. Ahhhhh stress.