Exhausted...

“Be brave and be patient. Have establishment in yourself; trust in the significance of your life and the purpose of your passion. You are strong enough to sit in the space between spaces and grant divine inspiration to shed some light. When you place positive energy and productive effort into the world it will come back to you. Occasionally in ways you might not immediately comprehend and on a time frame you didn’t expect. Look. Listen. Learn. Stay open. Your destiny is awaiting you.”
— Jillian Michaels (Unlimited: How to Build an Exceptional Life)

My busy season is coming to a close, and I am quite frankly just flat out exhausted. I just want to go sleep for like 2 days, and just sleep. It's been a rough season but I great one for some many reasons. I am just ready for it to come to a close. It's been rough with a co-workers brother passing away, and the hours I have been working since about January but a triumphant one for some man reason. I only have a little over a week left, and I can officially say I made it through my FIRST season ever, where I am not healing from a surgery, threat of a surgery or one any where in my near future. Which is amazing and a good thing! One which I don't think I can fully understand it until I walk out of my office when the season comes to a close. I'm paying DOWN my medical bills, not adding to them. Sure I am exhausted, but for the most part I am healthy and I am exhausted just like all the other members in my firm. It feels so good to all most have made it, but for real I just want to sleep for days. My brain is ready for a break. HOWEVER I do want to remind myself how hard I have worked, and as Jillian says, celebrate that fact. Most people don't even show up in their daily lives, let alone to work out while busting out 11+ hour days. I am proud of my accomplishments, and I am proud of the effort it takes to keep my high maintenance diva bitch body together. I am just exhausted.

Pilate's class with Miss P today!!! YEA YEA! I love this class. Little bit of yoga mixed in with Pilate's. It's so awesome. The music she has playing is always upbeat and yet trance like and calming at the same time. I am excited to get my butt kicked by her!!! I might weigh myself today, I might not. I feel pretty good, so why struggle with the scale. My clothes don't feel so tight around my belly and I don't well feel bloated & fat.

Eat some Chinese food yesterday... 3 times actually LOL HOWEVER I was conscious of the portion sizes and making sure to keep my calorie count in check. I stuck to my limitations I have set for myself, and rocked a half order of chicken chow fun and later at night enjoyed a good episode of Law & Order with hubbie and eat some fried Won-Tons with a small portion of sesame chicken. While I know the won-tons are not amazing for me, I stuck to limitation and this was a little splurge for me ;-) Plus I don't feel like my stomach is going to explode this morning, and my body for some odd fucked up reason can handle won-tons. Weird but whatever. I stopped trying to figure out why or how my body decides what it cant process LOL